Stephen Fry quotes
- Cheshire Cat: What do you call yourself?
- Alice: Alice.
- Cheshire Cat: "The" Alice?
- Alice: There's been some debate about that.
- Cheshire Cat: I never get involved in politics.
“- White Queen: Hatter's counting on you.
- Cheshire Cat: We all are.”
“- Sarah Johnson: There they are, in bed, together!
- Peter Morton: With Maggie on top?
- Sarah Johnson: Like she was in a rodeo!”
“I do believe in anything, provided it is incredible. That's why I intend to die a Catholic, though I never could live as one.”
“- Mad Hatter: [to Time] Is it true that you heal all wounds?
- March Hare: [sits next to Time and elbows him] Time is on my side!
- Mad Hatter: Why is it that you wait for no man?
- Mallymkun: [covers one eye] I just can't find the time!
- [Cheshire appears behind Time]
- Mallymkun: Cheshire! Where have you been? You're late.
- Cheshire Cat:...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- James Moreland: I mean, it's not as if he has never shown signs of normal intelligence.
- Catherine Boyd: Think of that! Nuclear fusion.
- James Moreland: I suppose these things happen. Idiot-savant, you know. A mental patient plays perfect chess. A nine year old from Alabama suddenly starts speaking in iambic pentameter...”
“- Mybug: We met in London.
- Amos Starkadder: Aye, the Devil's city. The stinking pit of whoredom.”
“- Peter Morton: Did you bring a surfboard?
- Andrew: No, that's just Carol.”
“The Encyclopedia Galactica, in its chapter on Love states that it is far too complicated to define. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of love: Avoid, if at all possible. Unfortunately, Arthur Dent has never read the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.”
“A man who no more knows his destiny than a tea leaf knows the history of the East India company.”
“The English language is an arsenal of weapons. If you are going to brandish them without checking to see whether or not they are loaded, you must expect to have them explode in your face from time to time.”
“Nudity is a deep worry if you have a body like a bin bag full of
yoghurt, which I have.”
“I don't watch television, I think it destroys the art of talking
“- Ed Walters: You see, you have a Lucas type four generator on a 12-volt system, and you know the British. They'd rather spend time gluing wood on a dashboard than getting the electrical system right.
- James Moreland: Fascinating, but what is wrong with the car?
- Ed Walters: Well, my guess is your stroke is too short and you're getting...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Lord Alfred Douglas: You like to write about dukes and duchesses, but you know nothing about them. You're the biggest snob I've ever met, and you think you're so daring because you fuck the occasional boy.
- Oscar Wilde: Bosie, please... You're killing me...
- Lord Alfred Douglas: You just about do when you're at your best. You're amusing,...” (continue)(continue reading)
“Space, says the introduction to the guide, is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind bogglingly big it is. And so on.”
“- Boris Podolsky: James! How's the rat business?
- James Moreland: Well, actually it's mostly students I'm experimenting on now.
- Kurt Gödel: My God, the mazes must be enormous.”
“What to do if you find yourself stuck with no hope of rescue: Consider yourself lucky that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your present circumstances seems more likely, consider yourself lucky that it won't be troubling you much longer.”
- Andrew: Let's try to be nice to each other. Cause it's New Year's fucking Eve, isn't it? New Year's fucking Eve, in Peter's fucking mansion, where Peter gets to be the lord of the manor, and I get to regret ever leaving England!
- Peter Morton: Andrew I know this isn't you speaking, this is "drunk you".
“- Maggie Chester: You slept with Sarah, I know you did!
- Peter Morton: Oh, my dear, the Archbishop of Canterbury has slept with Sarah! And that was years ago.”
“It is beautiful. It is fine. It is the noblest form of affection. There is nothing unnatural about it. It is intellectual. And it repeatedly exists between an elder and a younger man when the elder has intellect and the younger man has all the joy, hope and glamour of life before him. That it should be so, the world does not understand. The...” (continue)(continue reading)
“The best drink in existance is the Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which, is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon... wrapped around a large gold brick.”