Jim Broadbent quotes
“Horrible thing, to stand with your toes at the edge of the precipice. You can say anything you like, as long as you make it sound like it was a joke.”
“- William Schwenck Gilbert: No, sir. I can assure you, papa, that the very last person with whom I wish to have any communication at all is your estranged wife, the vicious woman who bore me into this ridiculous world.
- Gilbert's Father: How dare you, sir? Have you no respect?
- William Schwenck Gilbert: Don't misunderstand me, father. Nobody...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- William Schwenck Gilbert: The traditional Japanese posture adopted by well-meaning, but misguided, underlings upon the departure of their august superiors.
- George Grossmith: Would that be a recognised Japanese attitude, sir?
- William Schwenck Gilbert: Not as yet, Grossmith, but I have every confidence that it shall become one.”
“Madam, I rather spend an afternoon in a Turkish bath with my mother than visit the dratted dentist.”
“Nothing is impossible, Father, I often think of 6 impossible things before breakfast.”
“- Mrs. Judd: You can't work on an empty stomach.
- William Schwenck Gilbert: I can't work at all, Mrs. Judd, if I'm being constantly pestered by interfering women with hot beef tea, cold compresses, mustard poultices, and excessive attacks of philanthropic zeal.”
“A Borrower is quiet, conscientious, and inconspicuous. We don't steal; we borrow.”
“- Madame Gasket: Who are these losers?
- Fender: We, sir...
- Madame Gasket: I'm a woman.
- Fender: We've come to rescue our friend, you evil bag of bolts, and you shall be defeated by the very outmodes that you scorn and detest!”
“- William Schwenck Gilbert: Barker, what are you doing? Do you propose to join in?
- Richard Barker: My dancing days are long over, Mr. Gilbert.
- William Schwenck Gilbert: Over, Barker, but not forgotten.”
“- Eden Brent: There you are. Mr. Purcell, you have been stealing our dog yummies and eating them.
- Warner Purcell: Absolutely not. That's an outrageous suggestion.
- Eden Brent: Then let me see in your pockets.
- Warner Purcell: Would I eat dog food?
- Eden Brent: You'd eat anything that didn't eat you first, you big fat pot of helium.”
“- Amsterdam Vallon: Suppose you back an Irish candidate, of my choosin', and I'll deliver all the Irish vote?
- William 'Boss' Tweed: That will only happen in the reign of Queen Dick.”
“- Gilbert's Father: She is a veritable gorgon.
- William Schwenck Gilbert: She is indeed, and she has chosen her own path, and in so doing, she has turned her back on yourself and myself. And for that small mercy we should both of us be eternally grateful.”
“You have my sympathies, Lely. Unfortunately, your avocation as an actor compels you, on occasion, to endure the most ignominious indignities, to which Grossmith will doubtless testify.”
“You know why he wears short sleeves? So they can see he's got nothing stashed. I hope that never becomes the fashion.”
“The appearance of law must be upheld, especially while it's being broken.”
“We're not vermin. We're not creeps. And we're not pests. We're Borrowers.”
“We may be small but heaven help anyone who thinks he might squish us.”
“Faces are a doddle compared to tits and ass. No hairline.”