Eddie Murphy quotes
“- Papa Klump: I don't want to hear about you, old-ass geriatrics.
- Granny Klump: Oh, yeah, Cletus? Me and Isaac might be dried up geriatrics, but ain't nothing wrong with Isaac's love tackle.
- Ernie Klump: Oh snap, now.
- Granny Klump: What's the matter Cletus, cat got your tongue? Did I step on a nerve, Cletus? I get ya, got ya, got ya!”
“- Det. Mitch Preston: Why did you want to be a cop, anyway?
- Officer Trey Sellars: Because I was a shitty waiter.”
“- Jack Cates: Class isn't something you buy. Look at you, you've got on a 500-dollar suit and you're still a low-life.
- Reggie Hammond: Yeah, but I look good.”
“- Dr. John Dolittle: Shut up. You're a dog. Dogs cannot talk!
- Lucky: What the hell do you think barking is, an involuntary spasm?”
“- Master Gracey: You have very beautiful children, Ms. Evers.
- Jim Evers: I kicked in some chromosomes too.”
- Prince Akeem: Oh sir, the Giants of New York took on the Packers of Green Bay. And in the end, the Giants triumphed by kicking an oblong ball made of pigskin through a big "H". It was a most ripping victory.
- Cleo McDowell: Son, I'm only going to tell you this one time.
- Prince Akeem: Yes?
- Cleo McDowell: If you want to keep working here,... (continue)(continue reading)
“Oh there they go. There they go, every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out their ass. That's their one, that's their one. Rocky Marciano. Rocky Marciano. Let me tell you something once and for all. Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't shit.”
“- Blaine: You talk to animals now, do you? Would you like to tell me about it? Or would you rather tell my friend here, Bettleheim?
- Dr. John Dolittle: I don't need to talk to your cat, Blain.
- Blaine: Why, do you think he would talk back to you?
- Dr. John Dolittle: He just might.
- Blaine: And what would he say?
- Bettleheim the Cat: I'd say...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Donkey: I have a bit of a confession to make: donkeys don't have layers. We wear our fear right there on our sleeves.
- Shrek: Wait a second, donkeys don't have sleeves!”
“Celebrity marriages. They never last, do they?”
“- Det. Mitch Preston: My ex and I were on the rocks, and my marriage counselor said I needed to take up a hobby.
- Officer Trey Sellars: How come you never got good at it?
- Det. Mitch Preston: Well, it's kind of like you and police work. I never took it that seriously.”
“Once a loser, always a loser.”
“- Jim Evers: Honey, you know they have dead people in the backyard.
- Sara Evers: Well, some people have swimming pools, others have private cemeteries. It can happen.”
“Let's just say some things are better left unsaid.”
- Eddie Murphy: [as Bill Cosby] You can not say filth flarn filth flarn filth in front of people!
- Eddie Murphy: And I said "I never said no filth flarn filth! I don't know what you're talking about! I'm offended that you called! Fuck you!" And that's when Bill got raw on me!
- Eddie Murphy: [as Bill Cosby] That's what I'm talking about! You... (continue)(continue reading)
“- Mr. Wong: Remember, black people run very fast. But problem run faster.
- Norbit: ...That's kinda racist.
- Mr. Wong: Yes, Wong very racist. Don't like black. Don't like Jew either. But black and Jew love Chinese food.”
“My powers are beyond your mortal imagination. For instance, my eyes can see straight through your armor.”
“- Reggie Hammond: How much of my money did you spend?
- Jack Cates: Oh, about 25 grand. You said I could buy a new car.
- Reggie Hammond: So where is it?
- Jack Cates: This is the new car!
- Reggie Hammond: This looks like the same piece-of-shit sky blue Cadillac you had before!
- Jack Cates: Yeah, I bought the same make, model, year, color,...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Axel Foley: Is this your car?
- Jenny Summers: Oh, no. In Beverly Hills we just take whichever car is closest.”