Dianne Wiest quotes
“- Joyce: Shame on you, keeping your unusual guest all to Yourself. We think that's mighty selfish of you.
- Peg: No, it, it's... Things have just been a little hectic around here. That's all.
- Joyce: Oh, that was so sweet of you to want to correct the situation. What time does the barbecue begin?
- Peg: Barbecue?
- Joyce: Well, you intend to...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Tod: Um, a few months ago, Garry got his first... boner. You know what that is?
- Helen: If memory serves.
- Tod: Aw, great! Anyway, since then, he's been... uh... slappin' the salami. No offense.
- Helen: No.
- Tod: Apparently, he's goin' for a world record. Anyway, he was afraid there was something wrong with him, you know? Like he was a...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Bill: Okay, a little ethics. You are walking down the street. You find a suitcase full of money. There's nobody around. No human person is in evidence. What do you do? A You keep the money. B You use it to buy gifts for your friends and your loved ones. C You give it to the poor. D You turn it into the police.
- Kim: That is really stupid.
-...” (continue)(continue reading)
“The light concealing cream goes on first, then you blend and blend and lend. Blending is the secret. More concealing for you? But you complexion is so fair. Now this has a touch of lavender in it. Give it a try here. Close enough. OK. This should do the trick here. I have another idea. We'll cover up the scars and start with a completely smooth...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Jim: [after seeing Edward accidentally cut Kim] Hey! Now you've done it!
- Kim: It was just a scratch Jim, really!
- Peg Boggs: What's going on?
- Jim: Call a doctor, he skewered Kim!
- Kim: He didn't skewer me!
- Jim: [now bullying and shoving Edward] You can't touch anything without destroying it! Who the hell do you think you are hanging...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Nancy Morgan: Strange. I feel tired all the time.
- Mary Ann Taylor: Well, it's the Valium.
- Nancy Morgan: Yeah. No. It's a different sort of tired. It's... um... inside my bones. And it's real deep. Inside my bones.”
“- Julie: He said that he loved me.
- Helen: Men say that. They all say that. Then they cum.”
“- Emma: You're gonna get a champion roll in the hay.
- Tom Baxter: What, there's hay in the bedroom?”
“- Tod: Hi. Where's my wife?
- Helen: She's still at school. She's got cheerleading practice.
- Tod: Bitchin'.”
“Do you know why I'm having sex with machinery? Because your father went to have a party and I stayed to raise two kids, and I have no life!”
“- Penny: Shut up, Joseph. You're such a tight ass. Do you have to be so one-dimensional?
- Joseph: Excuse me for living in this dimension.”
“The formula is the star. I couldn't work inside that formula.”
“You are at the mercies of the dailies. With an indie you don't have that.”
“Sweet things happen. They still do.”
“I worry if they take Lucy away from her father they will take away an enormous piece of her, and I worry that she will spend the rest of her life trying to fill that hole.”
“- Helen Sinclair: Two martinis please, very dry.
- David Shayne: How'd you know what I drank?
- Helen Sinclair: Oh, you want one too? Three.”
- Helen Sinclair: I do plays put on by Balasco, or Sam Harris, not some Yiddish pant salesman turned producer. My ex-husband used to say, "If you're gonna go down, go down with the best of them".
- Sid Loomis: Which ex-husband?
- Helen Sinclair: Oh, I don't know which ex-husband. The one with the moustache.
“- Kevin: Man, those things are cool! You know, I bet they're razor-sharp. One karate chop to a guy's neck...
- Peg Boggs: Kevin...! Edward... would you like some butter for your bread? Great!
- Edward: Thank you.
- Kevin: Hey, can I bring him to show and tell on Monday?
- Peg Boggs: Kevin, I've had enough.”