Jim Belushi quotes
“- Mall Santa: That'll be three hundred.
- Howard Langston: Dollars?
- Mall Santa: No, chocolate kisses; yes, dollars!
- Howard Langston: I can't believe this, whatever happened to your lofty ideas huh? I though you're doing all this for the kids.
- Mall Santa: Well sure, but I don't see why we can't pick up a little loose change in the process.”
“- Victor Duncan: Why don't you do yourself a favor and go back to your white-bread, suburban, cesspool land while you still have a chance?
- Rick Latimer: I can't.”
“- Carolina: I’m marked. They’re going to kill me.
- Humpty: That’s what you get when you marry a gangster.”
“The harder you hit me the more I'll know you love me.”
“- Tyler Dayton: [back from the zoo] And then we went to see the gorillas and Mommy said it was you.
- Megan Dayton: I did not!
- Joe Dayton: Oh, really? Did you go to see the elephants?
- Megan Dayton: Watch it, Joe.”
“- Art Ridzik: Captain Danko, congratulations. You are now the proud owner of the most powerful handgun in the world.
- Ivan Danko: Soviet Patparine, nine-point-two milimeter, is world's most powerful handgun.
- Art Ridzik: Oh, come on, everybody knows the .44 Magnum is the big boy on the block. Why do you think Dirty Harry uses it?
- Ivan Danko:...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Bernie: Was that the chick from last night?
- Danny: Yeah, I picked up the phone and she was already on the line.
- Bernie: Yeah, right. Pull this leg and it plays jingle bells.”
“- Ivan Danko: I do not understand this sport.
- Art Ridzik: You're not supposed to, it's completely American.
- Ivan Danko: We play baseball now in Soviet Union.
- Art Ridzik: Are you kidding me? This is our national pastime!”
“- Joan: I'm a neurosurgeon, you?
- Bernie: I'm a prizefighter. Do you know much about boxing?
- Joan: No.
- Bernie: I'm the heavyweight champion of the world.”
“We're the teachers, and in our classroom two and two can add up to five if we say it does.”
“- Detective Rodriguez: I can make your life miserable, that's what I can do.
- Vic: Look at me. Am I married to a supermodel? Do I look strikingly handsome? Have I got a job at IBM and a swanky bachelor pad? No, no, and no! I loan big money to people like you who can't control their urge to blow it all gambling; Then I stay awake half the night...” (continue)(continue reading)
- Stevie "The Rose" Rosellini: You mean like a dame?
- Tony Greco: Well, yeah, like a dame. I guess you could say a dame.
- Stevie "The Rose" Rosellini: How about like a chick?
- Tony Greco: No, she didn't look like a chick. She looked more like a broad. That's why I said a broad.
- Stevie "The Rose" Rosellini: Oh yeah, that helps me. You're... (continue)(continue reading)
“Vegas is Sin City. It really gives you a feeling of looseness and anything can go.”
“I like to consider myself a star - a star, that when you look in the sky, it's always there.”
“Obama's sensible... he's just a reasonable, sensible human being.”
“- Howard Langston: I gotta tell you, Santa, there's something about this place that doesn't seem quite... Kosher.
- Mall Santa: Kosher? This coming from a guy who assaulted a toddler for a super ball?”