Richard Jenkins quotes
“I don't watch the dailies. You want to just turn in your resignation when you watch the dailies.”
“Chance is a nickname for providence. Okay? Well, which is another of saying that all history is inevitable, because it goes to the trouble of happening.”
“The end comes no matter what, the only thing that matters is how do you wanna go out, on your feet or on your knees?”
- Dale Doback: Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I'm looking good, got a luscious V of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes, "oh, my God, I've had the old bull, now I want the young calf", and she grabs me by the weiner.
- Dr. Robert Doback: Shut the... (continue)(continue reading)
“- Jackie: What's he gonna do, fold under questioning? If he does, they'll kill him. If he doesn't, they'll figure he's lying like last time and they'll kill him. Either way, Markie's dead. So why put the poor bastard through a beating? It's a waste of time - not to mention a really unpleasant experience for Markie. Just put him out of his misery...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Linda Litzke: I have very limited breasts, a ginormous ass, and I've got this gut that swings back and forth in front of me like a shopping cart with a bent wheel.
- Ted: You know, there a lot of guys out there who would like you just the way you are.
- Linda Litzke: Yeah, losers.”
“- Lotterman: What do you know about horoscopes?
- Kemp: Nothing.
- Lotterman: Ah, well, if I can write one, you can.”
One day my dad said, "Bobby, you are 17. It's time to throw childish things aside", and I said, "okay, Pop". But he didn't really say that, he said, "stop being a fucking dinosaur and get a job".
“- Ted: Linda, what do you really know about this guy?
- Linda Litzke: I told you, he's in the Treasury Department.
- Ted: But eh, no, I mean, you know... he could be one of these guys that cruises the Internet.
- Linda Litzke: Yeah, so am I...”
“Not to go after criminals because they might try to harm you is really not a policy of the FBI.”
There's an old saying: "Nobody comes from Los Angeles. Everybody comes to Los Angeles”. But if you do come from Los Angeles, then chances are you come from Pasadena.
“- Konstantin Karpov: The time has come.
- Richard Grant: I told you, we're not ready.
- Konstantin Karpov: You had 20 years to get ready.”
“- Maxine: Do you love me, Johnny?
- Johnny Leguard: Like a bee loves honey.”
- Miles Massey: "Dismiss your vows, your feigned tears, your flattery, for where a heart is hard, they make no battery". Mrs. Rexroth, do you know those lines?
- Freddy Bender: Objection, your honor.
- Judge Marva Munson: Grounds?
- Freddy Bender: Uh... poetry recitation.