Oliver Platt quotes
“- Hector Cyr: What the hell are you doing?! I'm laying a spring trap.
- Sheriff Hank Keough: I could have shot you!
- Hector Cyr: This could end up saving your life, which is meaningful to you, because the longer you live, the more sex you get to have with your sister!”
“When friends or family say certain things, they tend not to register. So it helps to hear it from a complete stranger... you're fat.”
“- Mary: I haven't been sleeping that well... I saw Tom but everybody's been saying he's dead.
- Dr. Wilson: Your sleep problems are making it difficult for you to distinguish your nightmares from reality.
- Mary: No, something is happening! Steven has scratches on his face.
- Dr. Wilson: Listen to what you are saying. You're talking about ghosts!”
“I'm a professional. I went to graduate school. I did all-nighters my senior year. I did a semester in Egypt. Do you have any idea what toilet paper feels like in Egypt? I delivered cinnamon rolls on a truck with bad suspension for three years! Do you know what that does to your kidneys? My poor kidneys! My freaking kidneys! My poor freaking...” (continue)(continue reading)
“I used to have a recurring nightmare that I was headless. I'd be down on the ground looking up at my headless body, watching myself walk around the yard bumping into things, and my parents wouldn't let me in the house because they'd just bought all these antique lamps didn't want me to knock them over, the fuckers. Then the neighborhoodkids...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Jimmy King: I just gave him a little flick!
- Sean Dawkins: Well, he's your friend, right? And you can't turn your back on a friend!... Right?”
“- Porthos: Athos, you cannot fight this boy.
- Athos: Why not?
- Porthos: I'm fighting him.
- D'Artagnan: Not until 1 o'clock.
- Aramis: I have a duel with him too.
- D'Artagnan: Not until 2 o'clock.”
“- Hector Cyr: In ancient Malenesia people suspected of crime's would be thrown to the crocodiles. Crocodiles would decide. They would be the judge.
- Kelly Scott: Oh, so that was you wanting to be judged out there?
- Hector Cyr: Maybe I was, and so what? Is that too arbitrary? Better to be measured by my wealth? Better for me to get my...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Mr. Sparks, the Tennis Pro: Perhaps we should wrestle sometime. Do you like the taut roundness that exercise brings to the buttocks?
- Maurice: Yeah.
- Mr. Sparks, the Tennis Pro: Do you enjoy the warmth of the Mediterranean sun on that self-same place? I once wrestled a man on the steps of the Acropolis, when the sun was at its height,...” (continue)(continue reading)
“The directors that I end up having a really good time with are the ones that understand the fluidity of the medium.”
“People start to act very unusually when they find out that they're dying, that they don't have that many years left.”
“- Porthos: For a chase, the Cardinal recommends his excellent '24 Cabernet. You can't have any, you're too young.
- Athos: Take the reins, boy.”
“Good thing I didn't flatline. My 350-pound babysitter would be chasing me for the half-eaten pastrami sandwich I stole from her.”
“Got to love the Lord for making things like that.”
“- Rupert Burns: What do they say?
- Andrew Martin: That you can lose yourself. Everything. All boundaries. All time. That two bodies can become so mixed up, that you don't know who's who or what's what. And just when the sweet confusion is so intense you think you're gonna die... you kind of do. Leaving you alone in your separate body, but the...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Harvey: I really don't like it when you tease the dogs.
- Vernon: What are you, some kind of animal lover?”
“- Hector Cyr: Let's not overlook the fact that he didn't eat me.
- Jack Wells: 'Cause he just ate a cow, stupid!”
“John, do me a favor. Don't ever confide in me. I'm utterly useless in these areas. I'm really a very self-absorbed man.”
“- Porthos: Champagne?
- Athos: We're in the middle of a chase, Porthos.
- Porthos: You're right - something red.”
“- Hector: Is this the man that was killed?
- Sheriff Hank Keough: He seemed... taller.”